Kevin导师: 讲文书带你进美国Top商学院

Yoosuredu 同学一：

托福94, GRE: 316, GPA：3.5

New York University – Master of Science in Management and Systems

Rutgers University  - Master of Quantitative Finance

Fordham University - Master of Science in Business Analytics with Scholarship

JHU - Master of Finance

Baruch College CUNY – Master of Science in Business Analytics

Yoosuredu同学二：

GPA：3.4，托福：101， GRE: 317

Johns Hopkins – Master of Finance

Yoosuredu同学三：

美本GPA：3.4， 免托福

GRE: 322

Cornell University – MPS in Management

JHU Sample Essay

How is your future industry evolving and in what ways do you hope to inspire change and create lasting value?

In college, I was obsessed with quantification. I always immerse myself in isolating factors and measuring their impact on results and get great satisfaction from the process. This passion guides my exploration into the finance world and sets my career goal as a financial analyst. For me, a financial analyst is more than a career, it also delivers enormous personal fulfillment when I find patterns from research, modeling, and calculation.

Today, the financial industry is embracing disruptions from many kinds of technologies such as blockchain, big data, and artificial intelligence. For example, it’s hard to imagine ten years ago that everyone from ultra-wealthy investors to working families taking financial advice from artificial intelligence, and then allocating their money on different asset classes on a real-time basis. All these changes can’t live alone without big data. I believe all financial institutions will put greater emphasis on big data and build teams of data analysts and computer scientists to improve their data capabilities across the organization. In fact, many fintech players use big data and encroach on various business lines of traditional banks such as lending, payments, trading, and wealth management. I want to a part of the evolution.

I want to inspire the following changes and create value that benefits both financial institutions and end-users. On one hand, I’ll use big data to help financial institutions to evaluate client risk profiles more comprehensively, hence minimize the company risk. For example, I can tailor a retail financial product on an individual level by evaluating a client’s financial conditions, delinquent history, and current behaviors. Each attribute plays a factor in deciding the pricing and terms for this client. On the other hand, I will collaborate with nonfinancial companies to enlarge the customer database. For example, bad eating habit is a big risk factor in health. Hence an insurance company can improve its products by incorporating the data from delivery apps and fitness gadgets into the decision-making process. Although many areas still need regulation compliance in place, I want to be a pioneer in exploring the endless possibilities of big data and create sustainable value in the financial industry.

To fully prepare for the trend of big data in the financial industry, I never stop developing my data analytics skills. During my internships, I’ve learned how to analyze accounting data on a large scale and how to manage databases, which provide essential tools to establish a financial analyst career. Additionally, I’ve gained a deep understanding of how funds perform professional market research and due diligence. Moreover, I expanded my data analysis skills by consolidating large scale data and building databases in SAS. Knowing efficiency is crucial in financial institutions, I also enhanced my data processing efficiency by analyzing auditing data and developing graphs in Tableau to enhance communication efficiency.

I believe my passion for finance and my MS in Finance degree will help me combine finance with big data and create long-lasting value in the financial industry.

Describe a time in your personal or professional life when you experienced a setback or failure. How did you react during the situation and what did you learn from the experience? 

Like anyone else, I have many setbacks and failures along the way. The setback in the Online Business Strategy Simulation is one of them which makes me learn and grow. The simulation is a group project in a business class that divides the class into six teams, each team has four members. All teams play the executive role for a virtual drone company and compete with each other during the ten rounds in the simulation.

Our team’s initial performance was far from good. Two of my teammates were extremely busy with recruiting and barely participated in the team meetings. We often didn’t gather enough information and made decisions based on our hunch at the last minute. As a result, our team was the last place during the first three rounds. It was at the end of the third round when I decided I can’t let my team drown and started a new game plan. I persuaded the other teammate to get him on board. We spent three to four hours a day in the library doing competitive market research. I built a competitive database with data from other teams such as investment, price, advertisement spending, promotion discount, etc. This database became the foundation that backed our strategic recommendations with evidence. At the end of each round, I met with my teammates and presented what I found about competitors and market trends. Then we made decisions based on industry research and data analysis. My effort did translate into results, and our team’s performance improved drastically during the later rounds. However, since this simulation accounts for 25% of the total grade, I decided to push myself harder and go extra miles to win the first place. I reached out to many industry experts and read industry reports from consulting companies like McKinsey and BCG. Finally, our team ranked No.1 in the ninth round and went ahead with the first place in the final round.

Although I am proud that I turned the setback into a win, I cherished more about what I learned. First, I learned resilience is the key. I didn’t give up even our team was in the last place. Instead, I am calm and confident and designed a roadmap to turn things around. Second, I learned how to apply my knowledge and experience in solving challenges. For example, I am the only one in the class who reached out to industry experts. I learned how much unique value these experts can bring from my summer internship. Going forward, I will also be persistent, and apply the classroom learnings to solving complex issues in the real world.

Cornell Essay Sample

This one-or two-page statement states your reasons for undertaking graduate work and explains your academic interests, including their relation to your undergraduate study and professional goals. Include your full name and your proposed field of study at the top of every page.

Inspired by my father’s story of building and expanding his manufacturing company, I was fascinated with business strategy and management since I was in middle school. I immensely enjoy reading about great business leaders such as Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos. They identified a unique opportunity first, then implemented the right strategies to build their business empires. I also dream to be a business leader and help my company to achieve success. I want to join my family business and expand market access for the biotech company that my father founded last year, focusing on finance and international sales.

The MPS in Management at Cornell is a natural continuation of my undergraduate study. I earned my bachelor’s in XX. Although my undergraduate learnings give me a broad understanding of business strategy, they are mostly confined to the accounting side of the business. To achieve my career goal as a well-rounded company executive, I am determined to further explore business strategy at a graduate level.

To prepare my MPS in Management study, I've focused on applying what I learned into practice and building a solid set of financial skills during my internship and extracurricular activities. I led a half-year financial statement project and drafted financial performance announcement by performing data analysis, managing databases, and interviewing functional experts during my internships. Also, I become increasingly skillful in data analysis by consolidating large scale data and building a database in SAS. I also improved my presentation efficiency by developing graphs in Tableau which help me better tell my story from data. Last but not least, I’ve strengthened my passion for business strategy through the Online Business Strategy Simulation. During the simulation, I often spent four hours a day in the library doing competitive market research. I built a competitive database with data from other teams such as investment, price, advertisement spending, promotion discount, etc. This database became the foundation that backed my strategic recommendations with evidence. At the end of each round, I discussed my insights about competitors with my team and made decisions on the next steps based on industry research and data analysis. My effort did translate into results, and our team won first place in the simulation.

Before starting my career in business development, I’d like to strengthen my understanding of business areas besides accounting, such as corporate strategy, marketing, and supply chain management. Moreover, I want to further foster my strategic thinking and leadership through real-world case studies and team projects, as well as learn from industry experts in relevant fields.

I believe a Johnson MPS in management degree will deliver what I want to achieve my career goal. First of all, I am fascinated with the high-quality curriculum and faculty. For example, I want to attend classes of Professor Peter Balnaves for his great teaching and real-world experience in corporate strategy. By actively learning from the faculty and fellow classmates from diverse functional backgrounds, I would acquire up-to-date investment knowledge, as well as a well-rounded understanding of business. Additionally, I would further hone my skills by participating in various learning opportunities. I will actively participate in corporate strategy related events, such as consulting projects in the biotech or healthcare industry. I will also try to get an internship in a healthcare company to gather relevant industry experience. Outside of the classroom, I will connect with Johnson MBA students as many of them have multiple years of management experience and are willing to help. Furthermore, Johnson`s close-knit community and the global network would further equip me to reach my goals. After speaking with several current students at Johnson, I am impressed by the Johnson family, diverse classmates, and their willingness to go above and beyond to help others succeed. I look forward to developing lifetime friendships with my classmates so that we can support each other in our individual goals. Finally, I believe Johnson`s top ranking, international reputation and committed career services will not only help me connect with industry leaders and peers, but also facilitate me to run the family business at a global level.

I envision with the knowledge and experience from my Johnson MPS education, I will finally lead the effort to drive the family business into the global market, as I have been dreaming for a long time.

NYU Essay Sample

Please develop an essay of no shorter than 500 words (typed, double-spaced) that discusses your professional goals and addresses each of the following questions: Why is this Graduate program right for you, both academically and professionally? What might you contribute to the program, both as a student and afterwards?

I plan to start my post-master career as a risk analyst in the financial industry upon accomplishing my study at NYU MS in Management and Systems. My long-term career goal is to manage a risk management team at a financial institution which I am always fascinated with.

I have made tremendous efforts to fulfill my career aspirations. I earned my BBA in Accounting from XXX college with a GPA of 3.5 and a Bachelor of Management in Accounting from XXX college. I’ve also completed two accounting internships at X Company.

I cherish more about the skills and experience that I’ve accumulated during my college years. Instead of focusing only on academic performance, I participated various extracurricular activities which cover other areas of business, such corporate strategy training boot camp and financial case competitions.

To strengthen my financial skills, I joined the 2017 Financial Case Competition and won the first place. Moreover, I became increasingly skillful in data analysis by consolidating large scale data and building database in SAS. I also improved my presentation efficiency by developing graphs in Tableau which help me better tell my story from data. Furthermore, knowing no one can complete complex projects on his own, I’ve also cultivated a strong team spirit through collaboration with students from different cultural backgrounds in the Online Business Strategy Simulation in XXX. I’ve learned how to effectively listen and synthesize different needs while building my own contribution on teamwork, which will ensure my success in study teams.

However, the scope of my study and work was mostly confined to accounting; my professional knowledge was valuable and relevant, but it was not enough for me to make a smooth transition into the risk management career in the financial industry. The MS in Management and Systems is a crucial steppingstone to achieving both my short term and long-term goals. It will provide me a comprehensive education on risk management, countless career opportunities, and a global network.

NYU’s reputation for academic rigorous is exactly what I need to develop my risk management know-how. I will choose the Enterprise Risk Management concentration, which will offer me a greater understanding of data analytics, information systems, and cutting-edge technologies. In classroom discussions, I won’t be shy of adding my perspective from my experience both in the US and China.

Moreover, I’m thrilled about experiential learning opportunities which will offers me the much-needed hands-on experience on solving real-world problems. I’ll actively learn from industry professionals and discuss how new technologies are applied in risk management in the financial industry. In the capstone project, I will serve as a cultural bridge in my team and lead the team to leverage the classroom learnings to solve the client’s issues.

Lastly, I can’t wait to join the NYU community where students and faculties are from all continents and have many kinds of walks of life. I plan to join the Management and Systems Student Association and establish treks or company visits for all students. My father owns a manufacturing business and will be more than happy to connect my fellow classmates to see how information technology be applied in the manufacturing space.

Overall, I’m excited about what NYU MS in Management and Systems offers and believe that my skills and experience will take my peers further down the journey of exploration and fulfillment.

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